Coconut tree shade
2 hot toddies
2 liters of “1 Barrel” rum
Bring 2 hot toddies to Belize, put them on Palancia’s beach under the coconut tree’s shade, next to the fallen coconut. Then wait till the coconut man shows up.
“Hi ladies, would you like me to show you how to crack that coconut open? They call me the coconut man!”
We sat in amazed as the coconut man, beat the coconut till it cracked, used his teeth to tear it open, then punctured through the biggest hole out of the three to get to the coconut water.
Then he said “When you get stranded on an island this is how you survive”
He explained how he is the coconut man in the area, and how he uses coconuts for everything, jewelry, shot glasses dildo shaped objects and anything you desire. After a long conversation he invited us to his place for dinner where he proposed to make coconut rice from scratch.
We were totally psyched. Organic Coconut rice! From scratch!!!! We are in!!
“3 pm sounds good, and we will be there with the ingredients”
And this is how we had the best coconut rice ever…
The coconut man went out to his coconut tree, brought back 4 coconuts, using his machete he cracked open the inside, extracted the white coconut into a blander. Added water and blended it till it all looked like a milk shake. Using the colander he separated the milky color water and the left overs.
“That’s how you make coconut milk, then you mix it with the rice, add salt, oil, and let it boil then simmer”
While that was happening we used the coconut water that he first extracted and mixed it with “1 barrel” rum for some extra buzz.
After, an hr of cooking, drinking and playing games. We sat around the table and tasted what was one of the best dishes we had so far in our travels.
Coconut rice, with suttee chicken and veggies. So simple but so delicious. The three of us ate in silence and admired the flavors of Coconut man’s cooking.
He turned out to be pretty freaking awesome, end up taking us night fishing, showed us how to fish using just the line and also offered us his place to stay till the end of our travel in Belize.
We took him up on it. Next day we packed our stuff and officially moved into the coconuts man house. The following day was somewhat a repeat but with a slightly different twist and flavor.
He invited his friend, the Water Man who lives downstairs. The water man is in charge of all the water in Placencia. This time it was the water man’s turn to show off his culinary skills. He managed to get some fish right of the boat and prepared us another finger liking dinner.
“What’s for dinner tomorrow???!!” I asked after finishing the last bite.
That night the Water Man had a brilliant idea and insisted that we play a drinking game. Since we didn’t have cards or any board game we made up our own version of Ring of Fire using dice.
“hahahaha, I love this game!! Coconut man you pointed!! Drink!!!”
“Coconut man you didn’t say “your mama”!! Drink!!”
“Coconut man you didn’t….DRINK, drink!!”
“fuzzy dog, dog fuzzy, what the fuck…. Hahah Drink!”
And after 20 minutes, 2 bottles of rum and many laughs, we managed to all get completely hammered.
“let’s dance! Where is my iPhone”
“the DJ rocks” Water man screams while he is jumping to a Polish song by “Raz, Dwa, Trzy”, that always gets everybody moving.
It was all happiness and laughs until the next morning. When I opened my eyes.
“Omg, awww my head”
I looked to the right of me is the coconut man, to the left of me is Iza. Then I quickly opened the covers to check if my clothes were on.
Then i closed my eyes and went back to sleep. After another hr of sleep, I woke up and Iza was dressed and ready with her backpack.
Still drunk she looked at me and said “Pack your shit and lets get out of here, I am not staying here another night.” without question i packed my shit, took a quick shower. And we boogied out of there faster then we came.
While walking in the blazing heat, I glanced at Iza and asked if she was ok.
“I am fine! where is the bus? We are going to Livingston”